Its ok to be “Wo” man 

Being human is being diverse , in thoughts in gender , in orientation etc. . As a natural extension  of being human , getting your feelings to work ,it’s also ok to be a (Wo )man the much maligned  “emotional” part of the species . But ages and ages of formatting and the phases from being a  hunter/gatherer to a famer and producer have created a very strong male / female role dichotomy  so that the smallest child knows after a while which is the role appropriate action he or she is  supposed to take and trust me this is now happening at a very unconscious level . It’s in our DNA  now and imagine the kind of DNA realignment we need to undergo to be able to reset our thought  processes  

As a Gen X woman professional , all our role models were men as we moved up the career ladder.  So, where we were taught to be professional “ think like a man” “ work like a man, what no one  ever told us was how to manage our emotions , our feelings , our monthly body changes, our  maternal instincts etc. . 

Now when I look back , there were no role models nationally or internationally to help woman  professionals to navigate the rocky career path . Most importantly, no male ever navigates a  career the way a female does and therefore empathy and understanding becomes a key issue .  Unless the male manager has an equally career oriented wife or sister or daughter back home ,  even with the best intentions it becomes difficult. 

How many men ever get asked what are your marriage plans ? What does your wife do ? Will  you follow your wife if she gets transferred ? If we think back on the hundreds of interviews we  conduct and we will realize that sometimes we do ask questions we would not want our daughter  to be subjected to . 

During our careers in HR, I am sure you have dealt with at least one complaint of sexual  harassment in your career . What is your stand? Do you carry the human in you when you handle  this or the “ what is good for business “ short term attitude ?  

If your daughter/wife who is a highly committed professional has her job offer withdrawn when  she declared she is pregnant after going through a tough selection process , would your reaction  be different than what it is at your workplace when you have to take a call like this . So, unless  you take the “whole “ you or the human in you to work , you would have a dichotomy of reactions  . 

With evolving times and business models, with the rise of women professionals as role models ,  things seem to be getting better but are they really ? Unless we are able to change the DNA of  our thought processes , the D, E and I movement will remain a “movement” . The normalization  of woman at work or the internalization of the “it ok to be ( wo) man “ thought has to receive  appropriate attention. 

If we were to look at journey of the working woman from before the Baby Boomers till now so called Gen Z ,it is interesting to note that even today majority of the women workforce is in  traditional roles ,or roles that allow managing a family alongside , roles that don’t push you to

pursue a career but are made so that you become financially independent but not necessarily  stoke your passion. Even now the percentage of career woman professional is far lower than the  male professional , though the sectors of women professional participation has increased , the  proof is anecdotal and not so much data based . Data still shows that female participation in labour  force is one of the lowest in the world . Only Pakistan is behind us  

The need is to move away from deification of the role Statements glorifying super woman traits of  managing everything; home and career have to go ; sorry multitasking is not a key competence  . She is not obliged to maintain a perfect family in spite of having a high-profile career . A family  is a joint responsibility of both partners . We have to allow the woman to let go of some of the  family responsibilities without the accompanying guilt. A friend once told me that I fretted too much  over the food options on the table . But as women, we are ourselves stuck by our life scripts and  upbringing . 

As we read about trail blazers like Indra Nooyi, Leena Nair , Sudha Murthy …it is essential to also  look at other role models who broke the glass ceiling , women professionals like Arundhati  Bhattacharya and Padmaja Chunduru . Arundhati Bhattacharya was the CMD of SBI before she  retired and Padmaja is the current MD of NSDL . The essence of being human , bringing your  whole self to work is evident in their approaches. 

Arundhati Bhattacharya talks about how painful processes like transfers and promotions in SBI  could get the human touch .Organisational interests would come first but does that mean personal  goals should not be considered at all. Merging the two could maximise productivity and employee  morale. Match the alternatives , create an organization that laid out for its people the road map of  their career and facilitate higher accountability of meeting organization goals . 

Padmaja Chunduru , the current CEO of NSDL used people power to grow Indian Bank through  a merger with Allahabad Bank . She clearly mentions that working fairly with your employee and  your customers helps in every way at every point in life . As a working woman who traversed the  journey from a rural bank in Vizag to a senior role in India and US and now spearheading NSDL  , she believes that women need to work for themselves first and own their decisions . Don’t bother  being a nice lady. Don’t take the easy way and wallow in self-pity . She believes you have to strike  the balance irrespective of whether you are a man or woman , of work and home. 

As a young mother in Philips, I would keep a very strict timeline in office . I had to leave on time  and my then boss was very clear, please go home on time and spend time with you child . I would  work after my child slept and my team would laugh at my midnight mails but I loved the challenge  and I loved my work and my organization ensured I did not need to select work over family. I have  followed those principles with my team through my career . Irrespective of gender , people need  to go home on time and they should not have to worry about body mapping , losing favour and  the like . 

We have to provide the changing role models to both men and women professionals . role models  that provide for equity , for equal pay , for shared family responsibilities , that allow you to get your  feelings to work, to get your right brain to work irrespective of gender . Its ok to cry, laugh,  celebrate and get your whole person to work  

Its high time we got our feelings to work as leaders, as employees, as managers as humans,  because without emotions we are not our whole self , we are not human .